27 years old from Rochester, Michigan

He contacted me on Ok Cupid, his user name is Cepo & here is what he looks like:

During the brief time we talked, he complained about how women just ignore him or disappear, & aren’t really serious about talking on the phone or meeting in person.

I told him I understood & that it happens to me too.

So what does he do LOL, he behaves JUST like the people he complained about.

He said he wanted to move this to the phone, so I asked him for his e-mail address. Then I also noticed that once he gave me his e-mail address, not once in the 3 times he had e-mailed me, had he given me his first name.

To me this is a sign the person is hiding something, so I called him on it saying that wasn’t very nice, which it isn’t. I mean come on, be mature & respectful.

I never heard from him again either in response to my e-mail or my 2 e-mails through OK Cupid.

So buddy over here complains about people disappearing & hiding & he did the EXACT same thing to me.

Nice

So Clint contacted me on Ok Cupid, & we chatted via e-mail around 4 times & then I called him.

He knew that I hadn’t made it across the border yet, so he offered to show me around if I made it over there.

He read my note asking him to let me know if he ever didn’t want to talk again & his response was: “Thanks for your note, I agree over 100% with the point in your Note.  I am a bit shocked that you have ever received that sort of treatment, I thought it reserved for us needy groveling male types, not interesting women.”

I will admit I was exhausted when I called him (he knew this), & after only an hour of talking, he said he had to get back to work. Fine, not a problem, it was unusual for me to call people during the day.

During our conversation, he wanted to know what food products I couldn’t get over here in Canada, & he would search for them for me & potentially send them to me, so I gave him the name of 2 or 3 products.

Now why would someone go to all that trouble to even offer to do that for someone, & then totally disappear, especially after my request for Clint to be respectful of me & himself.

Anyway, I never heard from him again, & that was 36 days ago.

Just thought you should know that when Clint says something, his word isn’t his bond.

Michelle

Nemo contacted me from Ashley Madison & he seemed genuine.

Before we started talking, I sent him my document explaining that if he ever feels like we aren’t suited to continue, that he should be respectful of me & himself & let me know instead of just disappearing.

Nemo said the following: “I must say a well worded document and can agree with everything you’ve said as I’ve experienced that myself……a lack of respect and common courtesy.”

I called him & I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to continue with him because all he did was go on & on about his wife & how she was mean to him & his kids & how he was only staying with her because of the kids.

I don’t fair well with men who stay with their wives & use the kids as the excuse, all the while damaging the kids because then they grow up learning it’s okay to not be happy, & to suffer & sacrifice for everyone else.

This behaviour shows that the person doesn’t love themselves, & they don’t feel they are worthy to have a happy life.

Obviously Nemo’s life is his life & he can do whatever he wants with it, I just choose to be around people who actually love themselves, respect themselves, they raise their children to do the same, etc.

I wanted to talk to Nemo one more time before I decided what to do, & Nemo said he was coming over near me for a meeting & he would get back to me with the date.

Not only did I not get a date, Nemo just disappeared & lied about his behaviour. I mean really, if he knew he tended to lie, why even bother saying he would let me know if he was no longer interested.

Just thought you should know how he acts if you are going to get involved with him.

Michelle

alphaicarus@hotmail.com
sebastmc@gmail.com

Despite all the signs that him & I weren’t compatible, I am trying really hard to give people more chances instead of just pre-judging them.

I don’t like to judge someone based on how they write an e-mail, but in his case, he wasn’t keeping the e-mail thread intact & he didn’t even know what that was & I asked him to keep it intact 2-3 times before he finally decided to ask me what it meant. That was my first sign that he likes to ignore, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt that he just missed it.

Then his subject lines weren’t clear, & in some cases he didn’t enter one in at all, but hey, I’m a nettie & a netrepreneur, so I tend to give people a break in this area even though it is really common sense & subject lines keep things nice & neat, deter one’s e-mail from being picked up by spam filters, & tells the reader why you are writing them.

Anyway, we talked for almost 3 weeks via e-mail because I was busy or not feeling well & whenever I called him (around 3 times), he wasn’t around. No biggie, we were getting to know one another via e-mail & it was clear he was anxious to talk to me on the phone.

When I did finally get him on the phone, I knew almost immediately there were going to be problems.

I’d say something & he’d totally ignore what I said & start talking about something else. I hate it when people do that, that’s like terrible communication skills.

After this went on for about 10-15 minutes, I stopped talking & of course like always, the other person expects me to pick up the conversation, so I said no, it’s not my job to do this, conversation is a 2 way street & I told him this was bothering me what he was doing.

He wanted me to ask him questions, I said no, I don’t have a list of questions, I’m just seeing if we can converse naturally.

Being knowledgeable in many areas, I can converse on almost any topic unless it’s really technical in nature like math or electronics, so if the other person can’t talk fluidly, there is a problem.

I decided to give him another shot & the conversation continued & FINALLY we found something to talk about, so we were on the phone for over an hour I think until suddenly he had to go – someone was at his door.

Ok, fine, I thought this was our time to talk since he & I had been waiting, but no biggie, he has a life, I get that.

He wrote me the day after or the day after that (can’t remember) & said he enjoyed our conversation & wanted to talk again.

I said great, whenever you want to talk, let me know.

Then he asks me for the my business websites & I had already told him what I do, so I didn’t think this was going to be an issue since he didn’t say anything.

I send them to him, & BAMM, he disappears.

The following day or the day after that I e-mail again asking if he got my last e-mail. He ignored me again & that was 6 days ago & he’s never gone that long without e-mailing me.

So Sebastian, you are going on blog warning others of how you treat women, or maybe just humans in general.

You don’t have the balls to tell me how you are feeling, instead your way of handling things is to ignore the person. I was hurt by this, not to mention it’s very disrespectful.

You can choose to act any way you wish, but when you disrespect a person by just ignoring them when they have every right to know that you are no longer interested, that is just not healthy in my opinion.

Not to mention that shows terrible relationship skills & while I wasn’t thinking long term relationship, even a friend shouldn’t do that to a friend.

I invested 3 weeks of my time talking to you & that took time out of my precious schedule. If it didn’t work out between us I would have respected you (and myself) enough to tell you, not just ignore you.

I hope one day you learn how to respect yourself, because it’s clear you don’t. If you did, you wouldn’t treat others in this way.

Adios

Michelle

I thought Trevor & I had a nice first conversation, but I’m now thinking it might have been because I had a drink which impaired my intuition, then again, maybe it was a good first call, so when I didn’t hear from him after I wrote him to tell him I had a good time too, I was naturally kind of upset.

Finally after 5 days went by I hear from him & I said to him that if he was too busy, that’s fine, but it won’t work for me.

He said no no, it was fine, he wanted to work on any friendship we may have.

So I called him again 2 days later.

He says he didn’t realize it had been a full week.

In my opinion the conversation wasn’t as good for me. He often had no words to say when I was relaying a story that was painful & I’ve learned a long time ago that if a person has nothing to say, their communication skills & sense of feelings/empathy/sympathy are lacking.  Even if a person has no related experience, it always bothers me when someone has absolutely nothing to say.

Not that I want the person to be upset like I am, but there’s a way to be sympathetic while not getting upset.

So when he e-mailed me to tell me he enjoyed the conversation, I said it wasn’t that great for me, & I’d like to talk to him about it.

I never heard from him again.

He works at the Woodbine Race Track as a Food & Beverage manager.

Nice guy, but I did warn him that from now on I was going got put people on my blog if they couldn’t be open & honest with me.

I won’t give out his phone number here, but if you need to confirm it’s the same person, just ask.